Words I have heard far too many times
Words that I once believed. For far too long.
If you just listened, I wouldn’t have to yell.
If you just did what I said, you wouldn’t get in trouble.
If you just keep this a secret, nothing bad will happen.
If you just lie, I won’t have to leave.
If you just did what I asked, we wouldn’t have to fight.
If you just let me…. I wouldn’t have to force you…
…
If you just…
Then I wouldn’t have to.
…
How could I have ever thought that these words were true? And why did it take so long to realize that they aren’t?
Ink & Embers 
“If you just keep this a secret, nothing bad will happen.”
It is a powerful statement which made me think about how I feel about things.
I wish I could be the “ignorance is bliss” just a little bit more, but I am the type that will research EVERYTHING.
No just in relationships, but in life general.
His is why ai block goodle and any other search engines blocked for most of the day.
Otherwise I would spend looking up unnecessary things obsessively all day. P (part of the OCD)
I am lucky my that my boyfriend is so awkward with people, especially with the other sex.. The spiciest thing that happened to him was that a guy pinched him in the bum.
And he is too awkward to speak about it , which I think is just hilarious 😅.
I have many issues in my life, but my relationship isn’t one of them. It makes life so much easier and I wish that for everyone 🙂
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Haha that made me laugh 😂 😂 I hope the bum pinch was accidental somehow 😅 and I am very very happy that you don’t have relationship issues! I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I am getting to the point where I am going to finally open up and tell my parents and family about the abuse so there may be more “poetry” coming. Honestly it helps me process what I feel though.
Also I totally understand what you mean about obsessively researching things… I do that too, oh the rabbit holes I’ve jumped down 😅
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“If you just . . .” makes me think of the dreaded “What-ifs” and their pitfalls: lack of certainty, dwelling, anxiety, missing the positives and so much more.
Great post. Thanks for sharing.
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Oh yes, those “what-ifs”… I’ve had countless conversations with myself asking “what if I had done this, maybe that wouldn’t have happened.” This healing journey I’m on is a roller coaster, but thankfully I don’t have as many “what if” moments.
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