End of summer talk

Leaves have begun to fall here in my small town

I’ve had some new followers here recently and I realized, you may not know me, or know what this blog is about. So I thought I’d introduce myself a little and also just give everyone a small update on life here.

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Introducing myself

My name is Allie, I’m a mama of two little ones. My son is 4 he just started his second year of preschool, and my daughter just turned 1 at the end of august! I like to joke that my home is a trailer house ranch because we have quite the menagerie of animals, all rescues besides the chickens! We have two elderly cats, 3 chickens that are currently freeloaders and won’t lay. ( they are only 2 1/2) We have our second rescue free roam bunny in the house, and we had two Guinea pigs (unfortunately one just passed away, more on that later) I’ve only been a stay at home mama for about a year, and I’m incredibly thankful for that, because it has allowed me to help my autistic son get all the therapy and hands on life experience he needs. And it also gives me time to, not only write here in my blog, but also to write my poetry, and work on my new novel! I’m slowly trying to make my dreams come true.

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Summer is officially coming to a close, the leaves are falling and the mornings and nights are starting to feel crisp. I love it! Fall is my favorite season. I love everything about it, the sights, the smells, the feel of that autumn air.

Warm coffee, hot chocolate, and hot teas. (But let’s be honest, I drink those all year round! Something about cooler weather makes it feel different though.)

Curling up with a hot drink, in a cozy sweater and a warm blanket, still warm enough to sit outside in the yard and enjoy the sunshine.

The leaves crunching under tiny feet as they run and play.

Somehow the air feels fresher. Like it fills the lungs more. Fall is relaxation and coziness at its finest.

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With the season changing, it seems like everything else is also changing. Along with school being back in session, and my kids are growing so quickly before my eyes, my state of mind has also been changing. I no longer feel the need to please everyone. Respect is earned, not a handout. I must change my priorities to fit life that I want. And that means making my kids as happy and healthy as they can be, making them feel beyond loved and cared for.

For all of that to happen, my goals I’ve been setting need to take place.

So here are my goals

• Get a remote job, so I can work and not give up the time necessary to care for my family.
• Finish my novel and second poetry book.
• Buy a home

While this list is only a few things, these are not and have not, been easy to accomplish. Time hasn’t been on my side. It’s difficult to sit and write creatively when your mind is scrambled with stresses of life. The chores a have been overwhelming too. With the kids having been sick, and my chronic pain at a peak, things keep piling up, so it’s been hard to do the things I want to do. The things I need to do.

Despite all of the pains mentally and physically, I am still trying my best, and that’s all you can do. I won’t give in to the pains, that will only make things worse. Instead, I look for all the beauty in things that surround me. The smiles of my children, their laughter, the warmth in my cup, the way the sun shines on the earth and the life that lives there.

Big or small, the beauty of life is everywhere. I never saw it before, but I have opened my eyes, and my mind, to accept that I can’t change the negatives, but I can see the world in a new light, and accept that life isn’t just me drowning in a vast sea of black.

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If you’re struggling, I hope you read this and that you can search for the light that shines around you, to find the comforts that you deserve, and to feel the joy in the little things. You are not alone, you are not stuck. There is always a way to catch your breath, and just breathe.

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Life isn’t meant to be perfect. Find the beauty in the imperfections, and smile.

~A